"What has been the key to your sales success?" I asked my new friend at a recent Meetup networking event.

"Oh, I don't sell. I develop relationships," the insurance agent said.

"Me, too. I educate others. I don't sell," the financial planner chimed in.

In the words of Charlie Brown, "Aagh!"

The words we speak determine who we are, what we do and how others perceive us. If you don't believe in what you offer, why would anybody else? Selling is helping: Pure and simple.

So stop apologizing. You say you understand the difference between a consultant and a salesperson is nothing but do you? If you speak as above you don't. But why?

The answer isn't that you don't have a process. It's that you don't understand there are processes within processes. When you truly have that step by step playbook, it's then you are a consultant. It's then you never apologize for helping.

Is developing relationships part of selling? Of course. Is educating part of it? Of course. But so is the scripted initial benefit statement to suspects, so is overcoming objections for prospects, and so is cold calling to empower gatekeepers to meet with signers on the dotted line.

Only when you know where you want to be and how to get there - and all steps in between- do you succeed. That's way more than selling. That's living. And that is who everyone wants to buy from.

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